You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize