Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
