Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
we're so committed to being not committed
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
