he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
