Well douche your snatch and let's go!
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
