have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
