i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize