Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize
