sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Randomize
