I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
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