I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize
