Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
You are a booty call, not a friend.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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