i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Randomize