Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
