that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Randomize
