Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
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