you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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