Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
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