i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
time to smoke my breakfast
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
