Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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