i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
