worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Randomize
