Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Randomize
