I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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