Porn is love you can see.
i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
