My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
