i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i may or may not be watching the land before time
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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