happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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