That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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