I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I stole a fireplace last night.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
i need some magic done to my vagina
my god I love twenty year old dicks
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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