i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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