some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Randomize
