It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
