the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
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