is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
