she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Randomize
