The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
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