What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Randomize
