Having a random hookup so left but love u
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Randomize
