i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I wish i was in the wii world.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize
