i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
