My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
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