Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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