I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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