I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Randomize
