Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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