i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
