I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
