he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
