I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
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