The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
